08/12/2022 In Podcast Episodes
Anxiety & PTSD – Michael Brose
Episode notes:
Follow Michael on Instagram at www.Instagram.com/superBrose
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Episode Transcript:
Transcript coming
Caitlin Bogue
08/30/2022 at 9:00 amHello, I’m a first time listener to the podcast. I’m not even all the way through this episode and I can already say that I relate to Michael’s story so much . Very similar upbringing, structure and stability in one relatively angry household versus alcoholic chaos in the other, athletic background…the whole ordeal. When my Mom passed away I decided I owed it to her to forget my art degree and I decided to become and EMT. She was a nurse and she would have wanted me to be in the healthcare feild. I figured that because I am so sensitive and caring towards others, it makes sense for me to take that road. I worked for 2 years as an EMT in the same state of anxiety that Michael described. I would actually hold my pee for up to 24 hours as a way to cope with the anxiety. Now here I am in a lower stress job, but unhappy because I don’t feel like I’m living my life’s purpose. Married with children, but having difficulty with my marriage because I don’t know how to be in a healthy relationship. I am finding the anxiety of being responsible for the lives of three children to be overwhelming, and I am unable to sleep because the anxious voice inside my head is telling me the minute I close my eyes someone will break into my house and kill my family, or a fire will take the lives of my kids-or I’ll only be able to get 1 or 2 out of the house instead of all of them. I’m not sober, but I avoid drinking because I know what it did to my family growing up and what nightly drinking can do to someone and I’m ashamed to drink in front of my children. I’m trying to cope with the anxious energy by training for a triathlon but my fat ass is struggling every day with binge eating as a way to cope with stress. My last ditch effort to get control over this situation was to make an appointment with my doctor, and try to find a podcast or book that wasn’t all about unrealistic expectations of happiness. Looks like I struck gold with this one. I’m not entirely sure the point of sharing this, but I suppose I just want to thank you for making me feel less alone.